Got an email outta the blue last week from a Dublin creative casting agency, inviting Valenitno Is Dead to take part in an audition for an upcoming TV advertising campaign!
I never did anything like this before, except of course for that leaked sex-tape I did a few years ago, so we didn’t know what to expect. The brief was erm… brief. ‘Come dressed for a gig but you won’t be asked to perform so no need to bring instruments unless it’s portable and you really want to.’
We turned up in sun soaked Dublin in 20 degrees heat sweating like pigs in skinny black jeans and white Doc Martins but buzzing to be even invited to try out for something like this (we’re easily pleased). After all if the music doesn’t pay off there could be a career in acting right? Gotta cover all the bases.
Speaking of bases, Clive didn’t bring his, Boey didn’t bring his guitar and David just brought a pair of sticks. I brought my White Falcon but just because it looked cool… and it matched my shoes.
Maybe it was a ploy to catch us off guard, or maybe it was a typing error but after chit-chatting in front of the camera for a few minutes getting to know one another casting agent Ali turned and said, ‘Right, what are you gonna play for us today?’
I was thinking, with no instruments the only thing we might be able to do is play dumb. We exchanged some puzzled looks and shrugs and then I grabbed my guitar and David grabbed a chair but not to sit on.
David counted us in and in our best barbershop quartet impression we launched into a new song called, ‘Outlaws Tonight’ with me on an unplugged semi-acoustic and David wrangling a-hell-of-a sound outta this chair and sticks.
Boey sang harmony and Clive joined in as best he could on the chorus but without his bass guitar he just stuck out, which at over 6 foot tall he tends to do anyway.
It was all done and dusted within 15 minutes but hey – that’s all we needed to sell ourselves – mind you we do come cheap! After that it was off to the pub for a well-deserved pint. It’s tough at the top (so I hear!).
-Keith, Boey, David and Clive
(NOTE TO SELF: Always bring instruments even when told not to)